HEALTHY, FAITHFUL FRIENDSHIPS

“FAITHFUL are the wounds of a FRIEND, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” – Proverbs 27:6

Next to Healthy Families are HEALTHY, FAITHFUL FRIENDSHIPS: “FAITHFUL are the wounds of a FRIEND, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” (Pro.27:6). This infers that a friend means well, even when he hurts you; but when an enemy puts his hand round your shoulder – Beware! Fate chooses our relations; we choose our friends. A true friend never gets in your way unless you are going down! This chapter of the book of Proverbs says much about Friendship:

• “Ointment and perfume delight the heart, and the sweetness of a man’s friend gives delight by hearty counsel. Do not forsake your own friend or your father’s friend, nor go to your brother’s house in the day of your calamity; better is a neighbor nearby than a brother far away” (vv.9-10). True friends are delightfully sweet in counsel and faithful at all times.

• “He who blesses his friend with a loud voice, rising early in the morning, it will be counted a curse to him” (v.14). True friendship is courteous and respectful; it communicates calmly, gently, and sensitively. Cicero said: “Never injure a friend, even in jest.”

GOD is the Fountain of Friendship. He related with Adam intimately until Sin separated them: “And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day…” (Gen.3:8). Abraham was the Friend of God (2Chr.20:7; Isa.41:8; Jam.2:23). God’s Friendship is ultimately and fully revealed in Christ: “You are MY FRIENDS if you do whatever I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I HAVE CALLED YOU FRIENDS, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you” (Jh.15:14-15). Friends are transparent!

Here are Five Important Features of Friendship:

We spend quality time and share stuff: God spent time with Adam (Gen.3:8). Moses spent time with God (Exo.33:11). We share news (especially good news); and mutually beneficial information (opportunities or warnings of danger). Before judging Sodom and Gomorrah, God rubbed minds with Abraham (Gen.18:17-19). Socrates said: “Be slow to fall into friendship; but when thou art in, continue firm and constant.” A friend is one who walks in when others walk out on you!

We mutually sacrifice: substance (Gen.2:8-15); service or expertise (Gen.2:18-22); advice and prayers (Jh.17:9). Healthy Friendship is mutual and reciprocal, as the case of David and Jonathan (1Sam.18:1-4). In prosperity our friends know us; in adversity we know our friends. A faithful friend is a solid shelter; he who finds one finds a treasure!

We care and share love: “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends” (Jh.15:13). Friends care and cannot bear to see their friends suffer needlessly. A friend strengthens with prayers, blesses with love, and encourages with hope. My friend is one who reaches out for my hand and touches my heart; someone who know all about me, but likes me anyway. Helen Keller wrote: “Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light”!

We stay with our friends even in trouble: “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity” (Pro.17:17); “A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother” (Pro.18:24). God is always with us even “in trouble” (Is.43:1-2). Hushai the Archite, though a servant, was David’s faithful friend (2Sam.15:37). A true friend is someone who is there for you when they would rather be someplace else. Martin Luther King Jr. said, “In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”

We sharpen our friends: “As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend” (Pro.27:17). True friends equip, edify, and mutually motivate like God did to Joshua and Gideon (Jos.1:5-8; Jud.6:14-16). A True Friend will see you through when others see that you’re through! Henry Ford said: “My best friend is the one who brings out the best in me”!