HEALTHY FAMILY LOVE (2)

“And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should LOVE his brother also” – 1 John 4:21

A HEATHLY FAMILY LOVE is the common stream that flows to touch the members of the Blessed Family: “And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should LOVE his brother also” (1 Jh.4:21). Love is the common denominator in God’s design for the Family. Members of the Family are meant to share God’s kind of Love, one that’s sacrificial, not conditional on material manifestations such as prosperity, possessions, and positions. Many failed marriages and unfulfilled families were not built on sacrificial love which searches for the needs of others and seeks to meet those needs. The wife concentrates on meeting the husband’s needs and the husband concentrates on meeting his wife’s needs. Such love is the root of fulfilling relationships.

Husbands are commanded to love their wives “just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her…So husbands ought to LOVE their own wives as their own bodies; he who LOVES his wife loves himself” (Eph.5:25, 28). Colossians 3:19 also says, “Husbands, LOVE your wives and do not be embittered against them.”

Wives are instructed, not only to respect and submit to their own husbands (Eph.5:22,24), but also to love their husbands and children: “That they admonish the young women to LOVE their husbands, to LOVE their children” (Tit.2:4).

Children also are to love their parents by honouring them: “Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise)” (Eph.6:2). The same truth is presented in Exodus 20:12 and Matthew 15:4 and 9:19. Children should not forget to demonstrate such love when appropriate, as was the case with Joseph: “So Joseph made ready his chariot and went up to Goshen to meet his father Israel; and he presented himself to him, and fell on his neck and wept on his neck a good while” (Gen.46:29)

Genuine and Healthy Family Love has the following characteristics among others:

Unstoppable: It cannot be quenched by many waters – “Many waters cannot quench love, nor can the floods drown it. If a man would give for love all the wealth of his house, it would be utterly despised” (SoS 8:7).  Water here signifies life’s challenges and storms. Floods represent great difficulties. None of life’s challenges and problems can quench a strong and healthy family love. Life is much easier and fulfilling when we have a supportive family that sticks with us through thick and thin.

Undemanding: It does not demand for money or any materials things as a condition for marriage. This love gives and offers help more than it demands.

Unselfish: It does not seek for selfish, personal gain, but strives to sustain the relationship – “does not seek its own” (1Cor.13:5b). God’s kind of love sees the needs of others from their viewpoint and finds a way of meeting them to satisfy our loved ones.

Encouraging: True love is not envious of one another; but motivating. It tries its best to assist the partner through education and encouragement, along with moral and financial supports. This is to enable the actualization of the potential of other board members. Healthy Family Love goes out of its way to seek special ways of helping the partner to be fulfilled in life. The husband, wife, and children are encouraged to be fulfilled in their various fields in life, by providing full-fledged support and spiritual reinforcement.

Enduring: Healthy Family Love is committed to a forever vow – “Love suffers long and is kind…bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, thinks no evil” (1Cor.13:4,7). Our Lord did not promise us a home without the storm. He promised to stay with us to calm every storm (Mt.8:24-27). Hebrews 13:5 affirms, “For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” This should be the continuing love-posture of every Believer in Christ relative to other members of their family.

All of these are made possible by God’s Love in us: “God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God in him” (v16).