HEALTHY FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS (2)

“WIVES, SUBMIT to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. HUSBANDS, LOVE your wives…” – Colossians 3: 18-19a

The wife, husband, and children have specific roles and responsibilities towards enhancing HEALTHY FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS: “WIVES, SUBMIT to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. HUSBANDS, LOVE your wives and do not be bitter toward them. CHILDREN, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord” (Col.3: 18-20). For better or for worse, family relationships play a central role in shaping individuals’ well-being across the course of life. These relationships can be sources of comfort, guidance, and strength to draw from in times of stress or drivers of depression. Developing and nurturing a healthy family can give us the lift we need to endure and overcome life’s challenges and meet our goals with confidence and courage.

Understanding the roles and responsibilities of family members will boost family relationships. However, creating and sustaining strong healthy family relationships takes time, effort, and patience. With the daily pressures of work, children, and chores, it can be easy to neglect our relationships and take our loved ones for granted. Healthy Family relationships derive from a family that understands and submits to God’s authority, principles, and structures on how each member is called to serve within the family.

God is our Authority. He calls His creatures to live under authority and has vested authority in people within the institutions He has established: Home, Family, Church, and Government. Exercising authority does not equate practising authoritarianism. Let’s examine briefly, some biblical principles that guide the roles and responsibilities of members of the family, help establish mutual love and submission, strengthen family relationships, and ensure effective bonding and seamless functionality within the family.

A wife who cheerfully accepts her God-given role as submissive Helper, who loves, respects, honors, and follows her husband’s leadership: “WIVES, SUBMIT to your own HUSBANDS, as is fitting in the Lord” (v.18). Ephesians 5: 22-24 elaborates on these.

A husband who cheerfully accepts his God-given role as the chief servant and head of household, who LOVES and LEADS his wife: “HUSBANDS, LOVE your WIVES and do not be bitter toward them” (v.19). Ephesians 5: 25-29 provides fuller instructions.

A mother who nurtures and disciplines her children in love and by example: “That they admonish the YOUNG WOMEN to LOVE their HUSBANDS, to LOVE their CHILDREN, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, OBEDIENT to their own HUSBANDS, that the word of God may not be blasphemed” (Tit.2: 4-5).

A father who nurtures and disciplines his children: “FATHERS, do not provoke your CHILDREN, lest they become discouraged” (v.21). Ephesians 6:4 says likewise: “And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”

Parents who love their children but show this both in compassion and in careful discipline. Compassion: “As a father pities his children, so the Lord pities those who fear Him” (Psa.103:13). Discipline: “For whom the Lord loves He corrects, just as a father the son in whom he delights” (Pro.3:12). Unlike Eli, they desire to please God more than impress their children (1 Sam.2: 7-30).

Children who honor and obey their parents: “CHILDREN, OBEY your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord” (v.20). Ephesians 6:1-2 reaffirm the fifth commandment: “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”

Undergirding these roles and responsibilities of husband, wife, and children are the virtues of Love, Submission, and Obedience that must be mutual between the husband and wife, and between parents and children. By extension, these sets of scripturally-guided individuals, groomed from the Family, become the citizens who obey civil government (Rom.13:1; 1Pet.2: 13-15); the church members who honour and obey their shepherds (Heb.13:17); and employees who work diligently and obey their employers (vv.22).

The Bottomline: “And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men” (v.23).