THE LANGUAGE OF LOVE

“Owe no one anything except to LOVE ONE ANOTHER, for he who loves another has fulfilled the law” – Romans 13: 8

God’s Word models for us the LANGUAGE of LOVE – active and expressive. Sadly, many people so often misunderstand one another and feel unloved by their spouses, parents, peers and elders, due to communication breakdown where love should be expressed. Technology accentuates this human dilemma. In an age of cellular phones and the Internet, words hover around the globe at the speed of light. Lives are inundated with swift speech and big data. At the touch of a mobile device or the flip of a switch, messages are sent and received; news and commentaries flow between the farthest, most remote reaches of the earth. Yet, despite the torrent of words, it is amazing how little connection there is between people.

In the midst of the information overload, very few words seem to be penetrating the heart. The language of the heart seems to be becoming more elusive than ever. Our world exhibits a nagging absence of authentic conversation, communication, communion, and connection. Most of the role models in popular culture are of distorted and dysfunctional relationships. Our world is aching for examples of people who release living words out of a storehouse of godliness and virtue. Interestingly, substantial portions of the Bible, especially the New Testament are conversations between God and humanity, and between individuals or groups of human beings. Some actually take the form of dialogue, one person directly addressing another.

The language of love derives from genuine intimacy, revealing the hearts and character of persons in the relationship. Lovers speak the language of the heart candidly and directly, whereas the world is full of fakery and make-belief. Communication that connects speaks from the heart and to the heart, and is not just a matter of the display of social skills or glib words, or the ability to orate with eloquence. Heart-to-heart communication is the ability to be authentic, honest and real. Even in marriage relationships, much of our language ends up being overly functional and superficial.

The Language of Love manifests beyond vocalised words. It can be displayed through: words of affirmation; commitment of quality time; sharing and giving; acts of service; and physical touch. These are patterned after God’s Words, Presence, Works, Grace, and Hugs. These are five of diverse ways through which love can be communicated to others. We see each of these in the life and ministry of our Lord Jesus Christ – our Perfect Example!

Words of affirmation: of appreciation, encouragement, and positive declaration. Jesus affirmed the woman that washed His feet and the one caught in the act of adultery (Mt.26:10; Jh.8:10-11). We are instructed to speak only words that will impart grace to people (Eph.4:29). God’s Words exude Love!

Commitment of quality time: Love is spelled T-I-M-E! True lovers spend time together in common pursuits. Jesus dined at Matthew’s house, feasted at Zacchaeus’ house, and even devoted time to the disciples after His resurrection (Mt.9:10; Lk.19:5-6; Lk.24: 36-46). This represents God’s Presence.

Acts of service: are expected of true believers – “through love serve one another” (Gal.5:13). Jesus said He came to serve people and demonstrated this as He washed His disciples’ feet (Mt.20:28; Jh.13:1-5). We express our love to others by doing things for them, reflecting God’s Works.

Sharing and giving: a gift is a tangible symbol of one’s thoughts towards another, but receiving a gift is not just about the value but knowing that one is loved. Jesus fed the multitudes and ultimately gave His life for humanity (Mt.15:35-37). God’s Grace is a Giving Grace!

Touch of Love: Jesus touched and healed the leper and Peter’s mother in law, and took the children into His arms (Mt.8:3,15; Mk.10:16). Extending physical touch to others must however be done with wisdom and discernment and from a holy heart: “Kiss one another with a HOLY kiss” (Rom.16:16a). God’s Hug radiates Love!

Fluency, maturity, and proficiency in any language demands practice. The language of love is not an exception. God has commanded us to love. Let’s make a commitment to communicate love, practise love and live love in every possible, legitimate and holy way!