WOMAN’S HANDS IN THE HOME

“The WISE WOMAN BUILDS her house, but the foolish pulls it down with HER HANDS” – Proverbs 14:1

The destinies of generations are largely determined by the WOMAN'S HANDS in the HOME: “The WISE WOMAN BUILDS her house, but the foolish pulls it down with HER HANDS” (Pro.14:1). Every woman in the home is either a wise Home Builder, a foolish Demolition Expert, or someone in between! Proverbs 14 highlights few ways in which wisdom or foolishness, and truth or falsehood could manifest: In our walk and ways (v.2); in the mouth and on the lips (vv.3,7); in business (v.4); in bearing witness (v.5); in our attitude to seeking (v.6); and in honesty versus deceit (v.8). The chapter has a wide application, but our key verse applies specifically to women with responsibilities in homes.

Today’s meditation text contrasts two kinds of women in terms of how they deal with their houses: The wise, godly woman and the immoral, foolish woman. “House” is used here not of a literal building but of the family or home. It appears that the oneness of the home is more dependent on the mother than on the father. However, God will hold the husband, who is the head of his wife, responsible also. If a woman tends toward foolishness, a gentle but firm-standing man will be able to help her see and change course. A wise mother can, if her husband has died or neglects his duty, always keep the home together; but if the woman has neither understanding nor good-will for her calling, then the best will of the father cannot prevent the termination of the home! The fear of the Lord and love for His Word are main keys to wisdom.

The wife or mother is called to be a manager of her household on behalf of her “head,” her husband and for the sake of their children. How she goes about doing that has many implications. The wise, virtuous woman applies wisdom to building her home (Pro.31). She is selfless and sacrificial in strengthening, encouraging, and blessing her family members. Her husband and children are partakers of her love, support, discipline, and care. Her spirit pervades the home, making it much more than just a place to live; but a place to grow and thrive. She lovingly raises up the children with her husband, manages the affairs of the family, and makes the home a haven of prosperity, safety, and love.

If we see a household “torn down,” we can expect to see behind it, a foolish woman with dirty hands. Foolishness can manifest as: disobedience to husbands; neglect, abuse, or spoilage of children; ungodliness and worldliness; lack of discipline, and an inability to control her tongue, anger or negative emotions. Being obnoxious, a nag and a gossip, and living for instant gratification, will lead to discord and disorder. To the extent that a woman does not focus upon the Lord, to that extent she will tear her own house down. Women who focus on materialism, pleasure, and carnal beauty will do great damage to their children. Some women elevate career above the high calling of motherhood. Others teach their daughters to focus on chasing men rather than seeking God and modelling a chaste character. 

Foolish destroyers of homes down the ages include: King Ahab’s mother who did not rear him to fear the Lord; his evil wife, Jezebel; Athaliah, who counselled her son to walk in the evil ways of Ahab, and at his death, killed the rest of the royal offspring so she could be queen (2Kgs.11:1); and Micah’s mother who blessed her son’s thieving ways and dedicated the stolen shekels of silver to make an idol for him and her household (Jud.17: 1-6). These ungodly women torn down their houses and drove future generations into greater destruction.

Godly women who built their houses instead of tearing them down include: Sarah who called Abraham lord; Jochabed, mother of Moses who risked her life to protect and nurture him; and the godly mother and grandmother of Timothy, Lois and Eunice (2Tim.1:5). Godly mothers build up their homes with their blessed hands, affections, and actions, and pass on blessings from generation to generation.